I don't make the rules

I went to see A Clockwork Orange on Monday night. I told Nathan about it last night at the quiz and he gave me a vast amount of abuse for forgetting to tell him I was going. That'll teach him to try poison me at his barbecue. Aaaaaaanyway, I figured that the viewing might be sold out by the time I got down there, so I decided to book tickets online. It's showing as part of Mark Kermode's curated Origins series and was only shown on one night and I guessed demand might be high. On the City Screen's website you can actually choose your tickets as you book them so you can get the best in the house. I found a seat that was in the middle of the row and was far away from every other taken seat. This particular seat would have at least two seats around me of space and I assumed since I'd bought the ticket quite late on I would have the area to myself. Bliss. I wandered my merry way down through town clutching my home printed ticket (so I didn't have to wait in line) whilst listening to GG Allin on my MP3 Player just to get me in the mood for some of the old ultra violence and in out, in out.

I thought I'd better dress up for the occasion. I wasn't the only one...

I walked into the theatre about ten minutes before the show and found my way to the row I'd booked my seat on. I noticed a long haired youth sitting alone about halfway down the row. I thought 'I hope that prick isn't sitting in my seat.' I didn't want to start an altercation about who was sat in who's seat, but as I counted the seats it became more and more apparent that he was sat in the correct seat. His seat was correct and mine was right next to his. I took my seat after checking about five times that I was unfortunately correct and what followed was the most uncomfortable ten minutes of my life as I sat next to a complete stranger in a massive cinema that was practically empty. I could feel him shuffling about in his seat as much as I was and occasionally came the true horror that occurs when our hands lightly brushed one another's on the hand rest. They always do this at the City Screen, if you buy a single ticket they fill up the seats around you with other single ticket purchasers. It's as though the staff think they are doing you a favour by introducing you to a stranger who likes similar films. You've already got something to talk about and can see where it goes from there. It's like a dating service that you have no input in at all. I wouldn't mind, but rather than a hottie, I always end up sat next to some fucking stinking hippy student wanker. True story.

Right, where's my seat... Oh fuck...