Sunday, 10 May 2009

Ricky-ticky-tarvy

Fuck me, for some reason Jo's guest posting got 79 hits, nearly double the most I've ever got. Bitch. Anyway, I've thought this may add a bit of interest to the old blog, so I'm opening it up for guest writers. I did tell Al Sithee that he couldn't so now I look like a right tit saying that anyone can, but there you go. It's all about the ratings...

A quick update on what I've been up to over the past couple of days. Friday was spent in the dead confines of Rotherham town centre. Mark, Dave and I went out and did our usual round of Number Ten, the Charters, FUBAR and finally SNAFU. The place was empty, it must have been due to last weekend being bank holiday coinciding with the first of the month payday. Rotherhamites are nothing if not careful with their money. King for a weekend, skint for a month. I left early as I just thought I was throwing good money down the drain.


Rotherham on Friday night...

Aimee's youngest Dylon was having his six birthday party on Saturday evening and Juliette had invited me along to the adult section of the precedings. As nobody parties harder than six year olds, I said I would, also it would be a good chance to meet Aimee and Juliette's kids. I decided against wearing my crotchless clown costume after that whole 'business' at the school fete last summer. Aimee had hired a bouncy castle and the only thing stopping me going on it was the fact I had stuffed myself stupid previously and feared getting sick all down myself and all over the kids. I've noted from previous occasions that this kind of behaviour doesn't go down too well with parents. And the police. After several children had suffered compound fractures to the skull and vertebrae, the bouncy castle man came and took the bouncy castle away at six, leaving a wake of weeping children after him (The bastard really seemed to enjoy his job) and we all got down to the difficult task of drinking copiously whilst sitting in the twilight pretending it was still as warm as it was four hours previously. Anyhow, I duly met Aimee's other half, Martin, her next door neighbours, her kids, Andy her brother was also there with his other half and Juliette's kids, the latter I gave a good look over to make sure they bore me no resemblance. I ended up getting wasted and boring Aimee and Martin to death with tales of First World War archaeology. My job certainly sounds far more interesting than it actually is...


If only DB Entertainment supplied this kind of Bouncy Castle...

4 comments:

Lilja Laufey said...

Funny, I thought about opening the blog in alot of tabs so it would get more hits than usual, just to mess with your head! Maybe somebody else got the same idea?? :)

P.s I couldn't be bothered to read the rest of the blog, so I guess this will be the last blog I read... Your life isn't very exciting outside of Iceland. ;)

Abwehrschlacht said...

Awww, Lilja... My life wasn't exciting in Iceland either. How about if I keep mentioning your name, will you keep reading?

Lilja Laufey said...

Maybe...

Anonymous said...

You are a fat bold cunt.