Well Paid Scientist

I turned up at work late on Wednesday morning due to taking the wrong exit on the motorway (I ended up going through Horbury, the streets really are paved with gold and the roofs glitter with Bronze.). As punishment Wincey sent me off to the frozen North at the top of the site. Alice must have also done something similar to incur the wrath of Wincey as she was sent to work in the same evaluation trench as me. We were as far away from the site hut as could be and in perpetual shadow all day. It was freezing cold and I swear there was ice covering the trench and snow laid about. The gale force winds tore our normal clothes to shreds and so dressed in Arctic explorer gear we set about excavating tree roots.

Alice and I prepare Evaluation Trench 6 for excavation

I think it was something to do with the fact Alice and I are both blow-ins, she is about to start an MA at York University in something non-archaeological and I am an unknown quantity, with my constant drifting in and out of contracts. I think this is Wincey's way of breaking us both down so he can then remould us in his shape. Today Barry Onions rolled in, I was, yet again, sent to the 'Land of Thule' Eval Trench 6 to plan the natural features and Barry was given his choice of the good archaeology at the bottom of the hill. As I was drawing tree boles with frostbitten fingers, I could hear the sounds of laughter and music drifting up from around the cabin, where everybody else was working.

What I imagined was going on the bottom of the hill...

Barry also made his uncanny appearance on the day we had finished all of Sir Stanners crap biscuits and were about to make a start on the Chocolate covered Caramel digestives I had bought a couple of days previously. Sir Stanners had gone to the Supermarket (or sent his butler) and bought the kind of biscuits he thought us lowly peasant folk would enjoy. His choice was Asda's Smart Price Biscuit selection, the cheapest biscuits around. No Jaffa Cakes for us, oh no, we'd be happy with what Squire Stanners had provided and think ourselves lucky we got anything off him at all, the ungracious cunts that we are. Anyway, we'd spent two fucking days working our way through the bad stuff when Barry waltzes in and starts troughing the good biscuits with both trotters like the fucking pig he is.

Leave some for us Barry!!

On an altogether different subject I went to see Jello Biafra and the Guantanamo School of Medicine play on Wednesday night. I've waited twenty years to see Jello play live and, fuck me, it was worth every minute of waiting. He is the closest I will ever get to actually having a hero. I've been a Dead Kennedys fan since I was 14/15yrs old and Jello Biafra has shaped the way I think about the world and has to be one of the best unheard outspoken political commentators in the world today. I think his stance is best summed up by the lyrics in the DK song 'Stars and Stripes of Corruption'. A song which was written 24 years ago but is still as relevant now as it was then. Read the lyrics here and try to prove me wrong.

Fuck Censorship!

I was thinking about Jello Biafra and how he has worked tirelessly his entire life (and continues to do so) with little or no reward against corruption, censorship, misjustice and a whole host of other causes and goes completely unnoticed by the public at large. Then a little cunt like Boner pops up (pun intended...), says something trite about everybody should be giving their money to feed Africans whilst evading paying tax in Ireland in order to make himself more money and everybody flocks to worship at his temple of shit. Jello practically starves because of his beliefs whilst Boner sits on a vast fortune because of someone else's ideas. Where is the fucking justice in the world?

'So, Mister Bush, what are ye gunna do aboyt de Tird World Debt?'

'Fuck all, Mr Boner.'

'Sure, that's grand, Oi'll get de stupid peasents dat buy me fucken records to give oop dere hard earned nicker instead.'