Fore!

I forgot to mention in my last post about Stainforth that we took luncheon at the local cafe. Well, we actually took morning break in the cafe; McCoy and Jackson were too scared by the old battle-axe serving us to go back for Tiffin. They said she was speaking in a foreign language that they didn't understand, I told them it was normal South Yorkshire dialect and I had to stand in as translator. During this outreach program for the local community a gentleman approached us. He and his 'wife' had been sitting in the cafe drinking tea and as he was waiting for her to finish her ablutions our eyes met. He seized the chance to approach me with a stout business deal. The fellow had about his person a bag of golf clubs and asked if any of us would like to buy them. He offered no price but told us in great detail that he had just bought a new set and was wishing to rid himself of these old clubs. Curiously he told us they were not branded, although I pointed out both a Wilson and a Dunlop club to him. He quickly passed this by and proceeded to inform us that he'd recently had them re-shafted. On our refusal at such an attractive offer he told us that he and his 'wife' were heading 'down town' to offload them. He was hoping to get 'about fifteen quid' for them. I advised him to place them on EBay, an idea which was poo-pooed as too much faffing about. After he left, several aspects of the encounter played on my mind; Why would you be selling some golf clubs you have recently fixed up? Why didn't he identify at least two named brand clubs within the set? And more importantly he didn't look like a golfer, he looked more like a smack head. Just what was going on here? Were we being duped into buying stolen goods in order to give him a 'fix'? Would we have been propping up the seedy underside of Stainforth's heroin trade? In the end we wished him God Speed in his endeavour and said our farewells, he left us to our sausage sandwiches and cups of tea and I was left thinking I should have bought them and sold them on EBay...

'How much mate?'
'£15 or whatever you've got in your wallet...'

Herr Docktor Clay steered me towards this article on the BBC News website. As Clay rightly pointed out U2 made $109m last year, which is over three time MORE than the British Government gave in aid to Haiti. What has happened to that money? Has any gone to help the people suffering half way around the world, or has it just gone straight into U2's offshore accounts so the only people they are helping are themselves? Now, before you all start bleating about 'it's their money they can do what they want with it!' Yes that's true, it is their money and they can eat it, burn it or shove up their fucking collective arses for all I care. But it stinks of FUCKING HYPOCRISY when Boner is telling the rest of the world to give up our hard earned cash for charity. This money is going towards flying hats on first class seats to Italy, it goes towards impressing teenagers with a $12m yacht. What is worse is that the U2 fans stand by and support this bunch of wankers by buying more of their albums and paying to watch them prance about on stage like a bunch of Moldovan Bears on hot plates. Are you so fucking dumb? It boils down to this, if you like U2 then you are dumb and you're the kind of person that liked Avatar as well and that means you are a CUNT! A DUMB CUNT!

Ha ha, yeah I'm laughing at YOU, you DUMB FUCKING TOSSERS!!