Wednesday 7 September 2011

Project Dim

I went to see Project Nim last night, Chris and Chloe were also there so I ended up getting pissed with them in the bowels of the Lendal Cellars. A couple of weeks ago I went to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes with Moogdroog, so this was a perfect continuation to the monkey themed cinematic experience. Being a massive life long fan of monkeys I loved both shows, I was roaring with laughter all the way through because monkeys are so funny, even when they aren't wearing fez's or riding around on tricycles. Here is a review of Rise of the Project of the Nim:


In 1972 a monkey (Nim, played by a heavily made-up Orson Welles)  is born to human parents in Connecticut, Harold and Katie Dre (Joe Pesci and Oprah Winfrey). At first the monkey child is placid and friendly but full of intelligence, the monkey hides his intelligence knowing it may one day be his downfall. The Dre's take Nim around the country showing him at Country Fairs as his skills in riding tricycles grows. Nim becomes a national sensation as a daredevil Wall-Of-Death monkey tricyclist, quickly securing a TV contract he becomes a television star. As he becomes more famous, he grows further and further away from his parents, who by this time have given birth to a performing dog (Joe DiMaggio, uncredited). The Dre's put all their attention into the new child's singing career and Nim grows impatient and more and more distant. Nim ploughs part of his vast fortune into the fledgling race to the moon, sending monkeys into space to explore the outer reaches of human (and monkey) understanding. Then tragedy strikes and Nim is apparently killed in a stunt that goes wrong when he was set to jump over twenty London buses on fire. The nation mourns the loss of a hero and visionary, but quickly recovers when the stunt is finally beaten by the performing dog who has abandoned the singing for a career on the track.


Five years pass and the action switches to the dark side of the moon, where we discover Nim still alive and well. The stunt catastrophe was a cover up for his escape from Earth. We also learn the monkeys sent up to the Moon are also alive and have created a colony far from their human oppressors. Under Nim's instruction and funding the colony have built a startling array of weaponry, including tricylces fitted with heavy machine guns and armoured fez's. All set for an invasion Nim's monkey army begin the assault on Earth and it isn't long before all the monkeys in all the zoos in all the world are brought together to fight humanity.


Nim leads the monkeys to victory and vanquishes the remaining humans to the zoos. Only one human is left, Harold Dre, Nim's father. During Nim's absence, Harold used the time to create an exo-skeleton suit, initially for use in stunt tricks, but also housing a complex surface to air missile system. Dre defeats Nim's monkey airforce but has underestimated the intelligent powers of his son. A 78 minute cataclysmic showdown in the Grand Canyon sees Nim finally defeats his father with a clever use of an armoured tricycle (I won't reveal the delicious twist here!) and the world is enslaved under the yoke of the monkey. The film ends with a long scene in the monkey parliament where they decide which monkey will be in charge by throwing shit at each other and wanking.

10 on 10!!